A few months ago I had a realization about myself that I have never had before. You can probably guess by the title of the blog that it's about anger, something that I work on daily. Now I don't go yelling at people or punching things; thankfully I have progressed past that point, but I do have thoughts like, "You dork, why are you driving like that?" or "Are you kidding me?" Maybe you've caught yourself saying similar things in your mind. While these don't harm other people, I believe they actually have a negative impact on ourselves. They seem really insignificant right? But the smallest crack can turn into a gaping hole.
Now I'm a religious person and I believe that Satan (as described in the Bible) exists and wants us to be miserable like he is. I would argue that these seemingly natural thoughts are one of his ways to weaken and tear us down (light attracts light, darkness more darkness). Indeed, we feel justified in saying that guy is an idiot because he's driving like a maniac. However, do we ever really know the whole story? If the guy had a sign above his car saying "My wife is going into labor!" most people would understand and excuse him, and they wouldn't have negative thoughts. But until that day of emergency car messages we will have to be tolerant and understanding.
I feel like I digressed a little but hopefully it makes a point about what kind of anger I'm referring to. It is the very small anger we feel over everyday things. "I lost my keys!" "I spilled on my nice shirt!" "My roommates are messy!" These smaller negative thoughts can weaken our spirituality, because any anger, big or small, can cause further negativity (or in religious terms, push the Holy Spirit away).
This is what I realized. For one month I went without feeling (or I controlled really well) these small angers. I felt a huge difference in how I felt; I could definitely feel greater inspiration. Then events happened in my life and I did not control my anger as well. I felt myself weaken and as I weakened, the more I felt other negative thoughts. So my point is, we must be cautious in what we say or think. Even small amounts of anger need to be controlled or they could get out of control, hence my Star Wars reference. Let's all do a little better at controlling our thoughts. This is the quote I was thinking of when I initially thought of this.
"Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering." -Yoda
