Life Lesson: Humility

I would like to think the majority of the time I am sufficiently humble.  But right off the bat I disagree with that statement because if I'm going to be humble why not be completely humble instead of going half way or even 99%.  That goes for a lot of things as well but today my thoughts are on humility.

I've made a lot of mistakes lately.  You may be thinking, "Oh man, another perfectionist!"  This is true, I am.  Regardless I really feel like I've dropped the ball regarding my family, friends, school, and church responsibilities.  When I ask my inner self how this came about, the feeling I get is I have been prideful.  I seem to be running my own little "Nephites" scenario.  Therefore the reason I decided to write about this is to act as a warning voice for others; as well as offering suggestions on how to eliminate pride.

Pride is a destructive state of being.  It tears apart friendships, it ravages homes, and slowly degrades the individual.  It is manipulative and selfish.  Pride feeds on fear, loneliness, and low self-esteem.  It categorizes and stereotypes, and judges other people.  Pride has no foundation and is constantly pushing down on anything and anyone to get even a little higher.  It delights in mediocrity and relishes in insecurity.  Pride is many many other things.

In the Book of Mormon, Alma the younger in Alma chapter 32 shares insights on humility.  The phrase that always comes to mind is verse 14, "And now, as I said unto you, that because ye were compelled to be humble ye were blessed, do ye not suppose that they are more blessed who truly humble themselves because of the word?"  Being compelled to be humble isn't easy, and it isn't fun.  To the prideful individual it can even be quite painful, especially when they realize the pain they have caused in others.


Here are my suggestions to eliminating pride.

1. Pray to whatever God you believe in and thank him (or her) for anything you can think of.
2. Serve others everyday.  Be thoughtful.  Even schedule a regular time to volunteer somewhere.
3. Learn something new.  The more you study the more you'll realize how little you know.
4. Live life as an adventure.  Take risks.  There's something to learn from every experience.
5. Believe in other people.  Look for and bring out other people's great potential.

There are many more ways to do it, but these are the ones close to my heart.  In no way am I perfect at any of these, hence the reason I'm writing about it.  My only wish is to act as a warning voice and help someone else.  It is my prayer that we may be counted among those who humble themselves.


MGBWY

An Amazing Experience: Mormon Tabernacle Choir Christmas Concert

I've recently finished a semester full of school and other exciting activities.  The one that stands out in my mind the most is the opportunity I had to participate in this year's Mormon Tabernacle Choir Christmas Concert with guest artists David Archuleta and Michael York.  I was a dancer this year and had the most amazing experience!  Here's a little preview of the show I found on youtube.

When I first saw the flyer for tryouts I was really excited and wanted to participate, but was nervous because I was unsure of my abilities, in comparison to other great dancers.  There's a saying, "You may think you're a great dancer, but there's usually someone better."  So needless to say I was on the humble side of this.  But I did indeed make the cut and practices were twice a week up until these two final weeks, and they've been incredibly... amazing!

One of the things that I cherish the most from this experience are all the friends that I made during the practices and hours of rehearsal; and I even reunited with some old friends from high school.  Having friends and creating new ones is an incredible blessing in my life!

So performances began this last Thursday on the December 16th at a preview, and went through Sunday morning on the 19th.  The set was absolutely stunning!  The costuming was incredible!  And the choreography was exciting and fun!  They all went really well in my opinion.

The main reason I cherish this experience is because it helped me realize what I've been missing out on for several christmas seasons; it's the spirit of christmas that comes from focusing on the savior of the world, Jesus Christ.  I've thought more about this than all of the years combined; Jesus Christ, the gift to the world, the savior of mankind, mediator, advocate, and friend.  The very reason we celebrate christmas is to celebrate his birth, and ultimately the gift he gave us all, the atonement.

So with the many new friends to cherish and love, I also recognize my savior, Lord and King, Jesus Christ, and cherish and love him too!  We are loved by a loving Heavenly Father!  If you are in doubt, look to Christ; look at the gift he gave and the gift our father in heaven gave through him.  Love is the easiest gift to give, and the most beloved above all.  My challenge to myself and to any who read this, act now to love others.  Share the gifts God has given you, and I know that we will find the spirit of christmas even more abundantly in our lives when we do.

Merry Christmas everyone!  May God watch over and protect us all!

Fictionist: Live 12/3/10 @ Velour

I discovered this band this last summer thanks to my great friend Stephanie who has been a fan for a while. I really enjoy their music and how they play on both ends of the alternative rock genre.  Take a listen and I hope you enjoy it like I do.

Life Lessons: 2 Keys to a Girl's Heart

I initially titled this entry just "Life Lessons," but that seemed to general.  So today's life lesson is about what guys usually think/worry about... girls.  I got the 2nd half of the title from a good friend of mine.  Now don't go running away thinking I'm going to spill my "Achy Breaky Heart" here, I would just like to share some knowledge I gained with all of the other men in the world.  The principles I'm talking about are actually quite simple, but somehow guys always seem to mess things up.  Perhaps a little clarification and any comments will clear things up.

So I'm not the best listener.  I would say I'm better than average but when I get tired, exhausted, and worn out my capacity decreases tremendously.  If you are a guy who has a hard time listening, then this is for you.  The first key is the principle of "Validation." If you don't know what this means watch this good video.

In the video it shows one of the aspects of proper validation, he never talked about himself, he always talked about the other person.  For the most part this is accurate, however if you're like me and worried about saying the wrong thing then stick to comments that show you are listening like "Uh huh," "I understand," "That's important," "Yeah...," etc.

A second aspect is only offer advice when specifically asked for it, such as, "What is your opinion?" "Could I ask you for advice?" "Could you help me out?"  Direct questions like these are indicators of a desire for assistance.  Keep in mind, leading statements that might mean they want help should be answered with listening comments.  Such statements could be, "I've been thinking a lot about this problem," "I'm worried about this," "I don't know what to do."  These are not directly asking for help.

That covers the "how" but what about the "when?"  This one I'm still learning about, but I've noticed a few things when I've been a listener.  The individual is quiet and pondering, they will approach me, or their concerns will come up during a conversation.  The best way to help is to ask questions.  "How are you feeling?" "What are you worried about?" "Is there anything I can do for you?"  Sometimes the thought that we are there to listen is comfort enough.

The second key is the small things.  If you have a wife, girlfriend or are courting (dating) then you are already on your way to understanding the meaning of this.  The small things show that we think about the other person in regards to how they are feeling, how busy they are, and their needs.  Scheduled occurrences are great opportunities like birthdays, holidays, anniversary, etc.  But what is more appreciated (in my opinion) are the seemingly random or unexpected acts.  Such as getting their favorite ice cream, candy, flowers or small notes displaying you care about them.  If you know the person well, think of some quirks they have.  If you're like me and have a bad memory, write them down and keep them with you.  Other small things include making dinner, cleaning up, making the bed, and other things.  If you don't know where to start, start small and work up to the "bigger" things.  But maintain the small items by mixing them in.  there's a reason they're called the bigger things because they usually take more time/planning.

So those are the two keys to a girl's heart, or so I was told.  :)  Use them wisely and honestly, and good luck!  Feel free to comment and leave your ideas or suggestions.

Super Duper Busy

Wow! . . . Wow!  That's really all I got to say right now.  Life for me is going at 100 mph and not slowing down.  What's even more incredible is that I seek out more things to do with my life.  This semester is school is super busy with lab reports, and keeping up with homework, and that doesn't include reading material for class.

Amidst all of this I feel extremely blessed.  I auditioned for the dancers who perform during the Mormon Tabernacle Choir Christmas Concert.  I made it and practices are going great and are a lot of fun!  My relationships with my friends and family are still good.  Also, I'm graduating in April with my bachelors degree!  I'm so freaking excited!

Now don't get me wrong, my life isn't all great, cheerful, and perfect; far from it.  But I am happy!  There is still a lot that I need to do.  There are still friends I need to see how they're doing.  There are places I still want to go see.  But I just want to say how grateful I am to my God for all the blessings he has given me.

Thanks for enduring a little "grateful" purging.  :)  Have a fantastic day!

In a hurry much? (Part 3:Final)

The last and final part to my reasoning on why people should slow down.  This final part is more a look into the past and how other individuals around the world perceive travel.

The Past

Remember the days when people would drive just to drive?  I know right... never happens anymore.  It always sounds like something old people do... and it's actually what they do.  People these days are so caught up in getting from point A to point B that they forget all about everything in the middle.  I mean seriously, what happened to stopping and seeing "The World's Largest Potato?"  Really though, there are so many things to find and adventures to be had along the path.  And it's not necessarily that people don't want to stop at things in the middle, it's that they don't have time to; which is just another statement about our society in general.

The World

Depending on where you live throughout the world, travel is viewed very differently.  In Europe especially travel is more about the experience than getting to the destination.  Perhaps this is a view from outside the box of the european mindset, but consider this.  People who live in europe on average receive more time off than their counterparts in other countries; enabling them to spend time with their families and find themselves again.  The United States and Japan have the least time off.  I'm attempting to correlate the idea of time off and perception of travel.  How am I doing?  :)  What I'm saying is this, if people receive more time off, maybe they would take the time to enjoy the smaller moments or adventures along their paths.

So perhaps the best step is to plan ahead.  Give yourself enough time to make it to your destination plus more.  Try new things; be spontaneous!  You never know what you will find.  Drive safe my friends.

In a hurry much? (Part 2)

My previous post talked about actual time calculations which is relatively useless to the average person.  Interesting maybe, but not worth it to stop speeding.  Am I right?  However, what also intrigues me is the affect speeding has on how we feel.  Besides being an engineer I'm also fascinated by psychology.

I like to be the subject of my own little experiments at times, and this speeding one was a simple one I could do because I commute everyday to school.  The rules of the experiment were I had to drive the speed limit everywhere I went, and then examine how I felt.  Pretty simple.

I did this for a few weeks, and continued to do it.  Despite people passing me all the time, I was actually enjoying driving at a slower pace; not really worried about what time I got to my destination.  Removing that as a primary concern eliminated any anxiety and stress.  I noticed I felt better at school, and I felt better at home too.

I have one last story of a man's experience switching from driving to work to taking public transportation.  This is someone I know personally.  What I've been told is that this man would most of the time come home already upset, with built up stress, and frustration.  Could be from work, maybe.  After several years of this routine he decided to switch to public transportation to get to work.  Even within a few days, this man's wife noticed a huge difference when he got home.  So quite possibly by removing himself from the act of driving, he removed the other things as well.  Results being having less stress, less frustration, and being more patient.

So if you've got the time, and you'd like to see if it really makes a difference, do what I did and try it out. All it takes is some self-will and a curious mind.  There will be one final part to this segment.

In a hurry much? (Part 1)

Let's put together a few facts here.  The majority of drivers drive over speed limit, why?  Because they can and consider their chances of being pulled over are next to nil if everyone else around them is driving the same speed.  I'm an engineer and numbers help explain things for me, so let's consider 4 common drivers, who drive at 65 mph, 70 mph, 75 mph, and 80 mph.

If you want to double check my calculations the equation to get time is just distance divided by velocity (Distance/Velocity).  If you want minutes instead of hours just multiply by 60 (min/hr).  I travel about a 30 mile commute to school so those time values would be cut in half.  

So if I were to travel 15 more mph then I would save about 5 minutes of time.  The question to ask, is 5 minutes worth it?  Could I leave 5 minutes earlier and make the time up that way?  The actual calculations show that I would save a few minutes, but here's what I'm thinking.  If I set apart time to leave earlier, say 5 minutes, I will be on time just the same.  

Surrogates we all are

We are all surrogates.

We're all connected to some network or another, whether it's facebook, twitter, myspace, etc.  We create another form of ourselves in a "life" that doesn't really exist except on a server.  An identity that we think we should be or what we think others want.  We make something that doesn't accurately portray who we really are, because who really wants to know that.

We use these networks to hide ourselves from the world; to hide from pain, heart ache, suffering... especially suffering.  Some people realize living in the real world will continue to be painful, and who wants to see someone in pain?  So they hide, avoiding real friends, real experiences, a real life.

What would happen then, if we were all "unplugged?"  Our surrogates destroyed in a matter of seconds.  Would people come out, come see the real world again?  Or run and hide under the next rock?

What do YOU think?

Praying for Patience

The title of today's blog is Praying for Patience because I know this amazing family who wants to adopt another daughter from Ghana, Africa.  Her name is Patience.  The adoption center caretakers say she utters a prayer for a family every night.  She desperately wants a family, and I say we help give her one.

This family I know just recently found out about Patience a few months ago.  They were told by adopting officials that they should move quickly to adopt Patience because of some changes that might happen to adoption policies.  This caught this family unprepared financially and they could use any help they can.

So let's help bring their daughter home!  Let's give someone a home and family that will love them for the rest of their life.  You can contribute to their efforts by donating a few dollars or by spreading the word, or both!  To donate go to prayersforpatience.blogspot.com or by sending money via Paypal to prayersforpatience@gmail.com.

"To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world."  Let's bring her home!

You can read and follow this family's efforts at prayersforpatience.blogspot.com.  

Agency vs. Fate: Do we control our life?

The sun is shining and it's a beautiful day outside, and a great day to write a little blog!  I discussed an interesting topic with a few friends this last week and I'd like to share it and get people to think.  That's probably one of my favorite things to do.

So here's the beans.  What we discussed was the idea between fate and agency; whether our lives are dictated by our own actions or the decision of some higher power.  Or perhaps it is three goddesses who cut the strings of life.  :)

First of all let's see what the good 'ol dictionary says.  Fate is "the development of events beyond a person's control, regarded as determined by a supernatural power."  Agency is "action or intervention, esp. such as to produce a particular effect."

Here are some questions to tickle your intellect about the subject:

1. Do you believe that everything is already decided, and no matter the decision, it was meant to be?
2. If you believe in a God, does he/she already know what is going to happen to you and dictates your life accordingly?
3. If you believe in a God, do you believe that you control most decisions, but God influences your life at times?
4. Do you believe in God, but believe that your decisions and choices are the only source dictating your future?
5. Is life just life, and no matter what you do it will end and that is it?

Probably don't want to hear it, but here's a little bit from the Book of Frans.  No matter what you believe, I think our decisions still play a major role in our life.  Take for example two people, one who sits around waiting for the end versus the other who travels to new places, helps people, experiences life, etc.  If the question were asked, "Who lived a fuller life?"  The real answer, it depends. But most would say the one who kept busy and gained experience.

Well, there you have it my friends.  Some questions and ideas about how one aspect of our life works.  What do you think, fate or agency? 

Learning From the Past

Wisdom from Rafiki...

Simba: Ow! Jeez, what was that for?

Rafiki: It doesn't matter. It's in the past.

Simba: Yeah, but it still hurts. 

Rafiki: Oh yes, the past can hurt. But the way I see it, you can either run from it, or... learn from it. 

Cute and Fuzzy

Got to love it when your cat lies on top of all your blankets, making it impossible to grab them...

And then you don't want to disturb her because she looks so peaceful sleeping there...

So then you grab a sweater hoping to survive the frigid night...

Darn cute and fuzzy...

Rolling rolling rolling...

In order to save a little money, I've recently investigated the possibility of riding public transportation to the university which I attend.  I own a motorcycle and a car now which I am very happy to say, but driving a car 60 miles each day to and from school isn't as cheap as some people might think.  That's probably why they're always telling people to find people to carpool with, or take public transportation.

I even thought about searching for people to drive down with me, but there's a few reasons why I didn't.  One, everyone has to leave at a time suitable for everyone else.  Second, parking is a beast, especially at my university.  Parking passes are given free here so everyone and their dog likes to drive to school... even people that live 3 blocks away.  Come on people, a little walking isn't going to kill you.... or will it?

So right now, as I'm typing this blog entry, I am sitting on a bus on the ride home.  I can't believe it!  They actually have Wi-Fi on these things.... well the nicer ones anyway.  But still, if I needed to get online for something, a few clicks, and I'm there.  It's a nice system; I don't worry about finding parking, I can read, do homework, or even sleep on the ride to and from school.  So far I'm really liking it!  The only thing is.... there is no eating or drinking... good thing drinking isn't a problem for me.  Hardy har har!

I would totally prefer to ride a train to the university, but that system isn't totally working yet in my area.  Unfortunately it won't be working until I'm all finished with my education.  Ah, Cie La Vie!  But there is  hope!  Once it gets warmer and I can ride my motorcycle again, all bets are off....  Hello speed!  At least once a week... ;)